Things are starting to get better. I got to hang out with some great people last night, I took a mental health day today, and I look tan for some reason. I hope I don't have carotenosis.
Things are also picking up on the ole dating website. Let's do a breakdown.
Open Marriage and I are communicating, and I must say, he is quite verbose. His emails are lengthy, and I just don't have it in me to reciprocate in the same manner. He doesn't talk about his wife, and I suppose it's for the best, but I want the nitty-gritty on this open marriage thing. Don't you? I'll see what I can get out of him.
Introducing Baby. Baby is 19 and lives in New York, so I'm pretty sure I found my guy. Why does he have to live in New York? Cruel world. This was our exchange.
Baby: youre sexy
Me: You're 19 and in ny.
Baby: We can make this work
Me: How and why are you up? (It was 1 am)
Baby: How? You travel here and I become your young sexual slave. I can't sleep because I've found your profile.
Me: Flattering. You have it down.
Baby: I'm partially serious. If you were to call me I'd forever keep you in my imagination. 347-555-5555
Me: So cute. I took a xanex so probably not tonight.
Baby: Then text me at least, you sexy beast.
And then the Xanex took effect.
Introducing Philly. He has a hairy chest. Regulars know that I am a fan of this, but Philly is different. His chest hair is straight. Long and straight. So odd. I've never seen such a thing. I told him I liked it nonetheless.
I am currently IMing with another new suitor. We will call him The Gent. He loves to use lol and ends a third of his sentences with prepositions. My eyes are bleeding.
All of my more tradition suitors have left me, without a care. I really thought Sober Guy and I had something going. And French Victor? Pourquoi?